Wednesday, December 31, 2008
For me 2008 started off as a fantastic year. Near the end its had some hiccups in regards to work, but I'm back on track.
So many things to be grateful and focus on.
-ds making the rep hockey team
-trip to the wheels inn
-impromptu trips overnight to Toronto (3 of them!!!)
-new computer for mom (laptop)
Gratitude was my word for 2008 and its been so true. I've had so much gratitude!!! Thank you 2008 for being a great year.
I'll blog tomorrow about my goals for 2009 and my new word ;)
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
1. Write your own perfect eulogy. Commit to one page. How would you like your eulogy to read when that inevitable moment comes for all of us?
2. Sign up for one course. It could be a cooking class, french lessons or a self development course. ANYTHING! I dare you to search the internet after reading this newsletter and sign up for something with your credit card and make the commitment.
3. Eliminate one thing for an entire year. It could be alcohol, a certain food or a draining person in your life. Take one minute and write something down that you would like to remove from your life and do it for one year.
4. Plan and invite people to an appreciation party. Choose five to ten people in your life that you truly appreciate and invite them to this party. At the party do a little speech telling each person why you love them so much. If this scares you then write it down and give it to them in a card. BUT, set the date and invite those people now!
5. Go on a date with yourself in the month of January. Set this date aside now and plan a day where you get to do everything you like doing. At the end of that day, take a moment to write to yourself. While writing, talk about what you want for the rest of your life.
6. Go to the bank and tell them that you would like to have $100 (or more) automatically taken from your account each month and put into a separate account. In the month of December, 2009, buy someone a gift that they could never afford but have always dreamed of!
7. Go online and learn a simple card trick and then have fun doing this trick at parties.
8. Start a conversation with a stranger once a week.
9. Buy tickets to a show or an event that is unlike anything you would normally buy tickets to.
10. Stand up for yourself. If someone acts inappropriately and you know it then say something about it. You are too big to be small.
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
"Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful."
Norman Vincent Peale
"May peace be more than a season,
may it be a way of life"
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Some people bring unexpected lightness and comfort to your life. They crackle with energy, practically electrify you with their presence. And then there are those who leave you feeling stressed out. Or guilty. Or exhausted down to your very last molecule. I call them energy vampires, and obnoxious or meek, they come in all forms. The sob sister, for one, always considers herself the victim. The world is always against her, and she'll recount every horrible thing that has happened to her, wallowing in every perceived slight. The charmer is a constant talker or joke-teller who has to be the center of attention. The blamer, on the other hand, doles out endless servings of guilt. And then there's the drama queen, the co-worker who claims she almost died from a high fever or the neighbor who lives in extremes of emotion—life is unbelievably good or horrifically bad.
No matter which type of energy vampire you're dealing with, you're allowed to walk away. Many of us find this really hard to do. We're afraid of being thought of as impolite; we don't want to offend people. But there are plenty of ways to remove yourself from a killing conversation. When leaving isn't an option, you can still maintain your energy level by making a few minor adjustments.
Recognize the Signs
One of the first things to do is to recognize when you're being drained, and that begins with tuning in to your physical reactions. Is there a tightening in your chest when a certain person enters the conversation? Do you feel tired when you hang up the phone after speaking with someone? Does your head ache, or do you feel what I call "slimed" when another guest at a cocktail party starts talking to you?
Take a Deep Breath
The moment you feel zapped—or hemmed in, or stressed out—I recommend taking a breath. Breathing is a wonderful way to center yourself. Just follow the breath and tell yourself that you know what's happening and you can deal with it. It's important to remember our individual power. I know from working with patients that we can lose it easily. The minute somebody comes in who's bossy or blaming, we feel diminished and tense up. If we can focus on the breath, or on an image of a striking sunset or a view from a mountaintop, the tension will drift away.
You can also use some of your own subtle energy to counter the effects of an energy vampire. Visualize a protective white light around you: an energy shield. You can still hear the person who's yelling at you or blaming you or pushing herself into your sphere, but she won't cut into you so viscerally anymore. You've created a buffer zone, where her negative influences can dissipate.
Setting boundaries is another way of protecting yourself; you draw a line saying, for instance, "This is what I can do for you, and this is what I can't." You don't have to convince the vampire of the rightness of your stance. Getting defensive simply adds to the negative charge of the encounter. You want to remain neutral. When someone starts pushing your buttons, and you start sizzling inside, you've got to make the decision not to react.
I also suggest you step back and think about what type of people aggravate you, because I believe that one law of energy is that we attract what we haven't yet worked out in ourselves. If I'm a very angry person, I'll find myself surrounded by angry people. By paying attention to the people who seem so draining, you might discover something you need to address. It has been my experience that once you've worked through a particular issue, you're no longer worn out by that kind of energy vampire. And the vampires, robbed of a source, move on to more easily drainable audiences.
By Judith Orloff, MD
Monday, December 8, 2008
Okay so this below quote just sums up what I try to tell people! SERIOUSLY! Pick your friends that don't drain you. Leave the energy vampires at home ;) or better yet their home. Say positive things! Don't say negative thoughts! I so love the below quote! LOVE IT!
"You will find yourself refreshed by the presence of cheerful people. Why not make earnest effort to confer that pleasure on others? Half the battle is gained if you never allow yourself to say anything gloomy."
Lydia M. Child
1802-1880, Abolitionist and Writer
--- Abraham Hicks
Excerpted from the workshop in Chicago, IL on Sunday, April 25th, 1999
Saturday, December 6, 2008
I guess what I'm saying is so far, so good! Its all in the attitude ;) it really is!!!!
I love spring because its the fresh renewal.
I love summer because the heat and beach and my pool ;)
I love fall because of the crisp air and smells.
I love winter because of the fun and in an odd way, the warmth it brings me.
Life is good. Enjoy it all.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
1. Time Is the Best Gift
This year, put "quality time" at the top of your to-do list: quality time with your family, friends, neighbors, and special coworkers. Just taking a quiet moment to tell someone how important they are to you can mean so much more than any gift. Consider organizing a casual potluck for your friends and neighbors -- each can bring their favorite holiday dish, and perhaps you can spread the spirit by caroling after the meal. If entertaining stresses you out, get together for lunch at your favorite diner or coffee shop. And whether you've got teens or toddlers, a family movie night is a relaxing way to spend time together.
2. Keep It Simple
Probably the No. 1 reason for out-of-control stress is trying to overdo it. If you're planning your own shindig, or sorting out gifts for your extended family, don't feel obligated to make it to every single party, or buy for the whole office. Try our quiz to see if you're in danger of overdoing it.
3. Forget Perfect
Does your daydream holiday feature you as the ideal, apron-clad hostess presiding over a magazine-style home? Forget it. Trying to attain perfection could be a recipe for disaster. Better to focus on friends and family, and leave the super-hostess mantle to the professionals.
If you're dedicated to throwing the best party ever, then plan ahead. Decorate the weekend before. Plan a simple menu so you're not slaving in the kitchen while your guests are enjoying the party. Ask your guests to bring appetizers so you can focus on the main course. But ultimately, remember that the best parties happen when the hostess has fun, too.
4. Give Yourself a Gift
It's fun to give to others, but in doing so we often forget to treat ourselves. So go ahead and splurge on that sexy red sweater you've been eyeing. Schedule a 30-minute massage. Bake that chocolate cake you've been craving. (You could share the leftovers with your coworkers!) Or plan a quiet evening at home with a special someone and just the lights of the Christmas tree to keep you company.
5. Get in Touch with Your Spiritual Side
Whether you're religious or not, the holidays can be a time for giving thanks, and for taking stock of our lives and the larger world around us. Many people find themselves drawn back to church at this time of year. The ritual of the ceremony and the quiet moments of prayer can be soothing, and even humbling; a reminder of the spirit of the season. But if you don't wish to attend an organized religious event, meditation can be an outlet for your psyche. No matter what you decide to do, set aside some time for reflection.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
- De-convenience your home – lose the remote, buy a light garage door and lift it yourself, use a shovel instead of a snowblower
- Eat Nuts – Have a can of nuts around your office or home, eat a handful daily
- Drink Sardinian wine – Sardinian canonau wine has the world's highest levels of antioxidants. Drink a glass or two a day
- Play with your children – this is excellent low intensity exercise and will strenthen a family. Both associated with longer life expectancy
- Grow a Garden – This proven stress reducer will put your body through the range of motion and yield fresh vegtables
- Hour of Power – Downshift daily with a nap, meditation, prayer or a quiet walk--destressing is a proven way to slow aging
- Eat Tofu – Arguably the world's most perfect food, eaten by the world's longest lived women. Contains a plant estrogen that makes skin look younger
- Get a Tan – Doctors are rethinking the notion of slathering yourself with sunscreen. Up to half of Americans are Vitamin D deficient--a condition that can double your chance of dying in any given year. A tan not only looks healthy, it is.
- Donate your large dinner plates – eat off 9 inch plates as the Okinawans do and reduce calorie consumption at dinner by 20-30%
- Write Down your Personal Mission – Know and putting into practice your sense of purpose can give you up to a decade of good life.
Out of this list of ten, what are you going to do this week???
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Thankful today for:
- my family
- my wonderful husband
- my job
- a warm house
- my friends :)
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Now I'm stopping there. I'll be back to post how the rest of my day goes ;)
I'm concentrating on the things that make me happy. I'm working on some xmas stuff. I'm reading where Tim and I want to go this weekend (little get away to Toronto). Lets see if the day turns around???
Well Success!!!! I started focusing on Tim and the kids and what makes me happy (our up coming trip to Toronto) and boom. Two clients booked for this week extra, went to a friends for chai latte and went out and bought benny a new hat! Life is good. Just need to focus on that.
My bad day went to a pretty good day!!! Once my attitude changed!
Sunday, November 23, 2008
There is hope. You can change it around. Even in the middle of a truly crappy moment. Find your happy place. Go to it just for a few moments in your mind. Think of some gratitude...think of love...think of something good! It will turn that day around ;) TRUST ME. It will...
If I believe I cannot do something, it makes me incapable of doing it. But when I believe I can, then I acquire the ability to do it, even if I did not have the ability in the beginning.
Whether you think you can or think you can't ... you're right.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Gratitude is a good thing. What are you thankful for today?
- I'm thankful for a warm house
- for a hockey loving family
- for friends that are true and dear
Saturday, November 8, 2008
The older I get, the more I enjoy Saturday mornings. Perhaps it's the quiet solitude that comes with being the first to rise, or maybe it's the unbounded joy of not having to be at work. Either way, the first few hours of a Saturday morning are most enjoyable.
A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the garage with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. What began as a typical Saturday morning turned into one of those lessons that life seems
to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it:
I turned the dial up into the phone portion of the band on my ham radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning swap net. Along the way, I came across an older sounding chap, with a tremendous signal and a golden voice. You know the kind; he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting business. He was telling whom-ever he was talking with something about 'a thousand marbles.' I was intrigued and stopped to listen to what he had to say
'Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you're busy with your job. I'm sure they pay you well but it's a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet. It's too bad you missed your daughter's 'dance recital' he continued. ;'Let me tell you something that has helped me keep my own priorities.' And that's when he began to explain his theory of a 'thousand marbles.'
'You see, I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years.
'Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3900, which is the number of Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime. Now, stick with me, Tom, I'm getting to the important part.
It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail', he went on, 'and by that time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred Saturdays.' 'I got to thinking that if I lived to be seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left to enjoy. So I went to a toy store and bought every single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round up 1000 marbles I took them home and put them inside a large, clear plastic container right here in the shack next to my gear.'
'Every Saturday since then, I have taken one marble out and thrown it away. I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focused more on the really important things in life.
There's nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight.'
'Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign-off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast. This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure that if I make it until next Saturday then I have been given a little extra time. And the one thing we can all use is a little more time.'
'It was nice to meet you Tom, I hope you spend more time with your family, and I hope to meet you again here on the band. This is a 75 Year old Man, K9NZQ, clear and going QRT, good morning!'
You could have heard a pin drop on the band when this fellow signed off I guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to work on the antenna that morning, and then I was going to meet up with a few hams to work on the next club newsletter.
Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss. 'C'mon honey, I'm taking you and the kids to breakfast.' 'What brought this on?' she asked with a smile. 'Oh, nothing special, it's just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids. And hey, can we stop at a toy store while we're out? I need to buy some marbles.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Step 1: Pain and Hurt
Dr. Hallowell says the first step to forgiveness is acknowledging what happened.
- Talk to someone you trust and open up about how hurt, sad or angry you may feel. Let your emotions out and don't apologize for them.
- Don't withdraw or isolate yourself. Stay connected and feel the pain, even though it hurts. With someone there to listen, the pain is more bearable.
Once you've had the chance to vent, you are ready to appeal to your rational side.
- Ask yourself: What do you want this pain to turn into?
- Look for the hook. Dr. Hallowell says the hook is what is holding you back—it's the portion of the misdeed that is causing you to hold on to your anger and resentment.
- Empathize with the person who hurt you.
- Remember that forgiveness is not the service of condoning. It's a service to yourself—free yourself from the poison of hatred.
Dr. Hallowell says this step is difficult, but you need to analyze your anger and put your life back into perspective.
- Flatten the hook and rid yourself of the anger that is keeping you from forgiveness. Praying and mediating can help.
- Take inventory and give thanks for all the things you do have.
- You can imagine vengeance—just don't act on it.
- Think of your future. Know that you and your loved ones will be better off once you have rid yourself of any vengeful thinking.
Dr. Hallowell uses the word "renounce" because your resentful feelings may never permanently go away.
- Acknowledge that your anger can come back.
- If your anger does comes back, go through the process again and flatten the hook to keep moving forward.
- Try to teach others the skill of forgiveness in an empathetic way.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
by David J. Pollay
How often do you let other people's nonsense change your mood? Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day? Unless you're the Terminator, for an instant you're probably set back on your heels. However, the mark of a successful person is how quickly one can get back their focus on what's important.
Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson. I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here's what happened.
I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when, all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his breaks, skidded, and missed the other car's back end by just inches!
The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly.
So, I said, 'Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!'
And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck.'
'Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. And if you let them, they'll dump it on you.
When someone wants to dump on you, don't take it personally. You just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. You'll be happy you did.'
So this was it: The 'Law of the Garbage Truck.' I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people: at work, at home, on the streets? It was that day I said, 'I'm not going to do it anymore.'
I began to see garbage trucks. Like in the movie 'The Sixth Sense,' the little boy said, 'I see Dead People.'
Well, now 'I see Garbage Trucks.' I see the load they're carrying. I see them coming to drop it off. And like my Taxi Driver, I don't make it a personal thing; I just smile, wave, wish them well, and I move on.
One of my favorite football players of all time, Walter Payton, did this every day on the football field. He would jump up as quickly as he hit the ground after being tackled.
He never dwelled on a hit. Payton was ready to make the next play his best. Good leaders know they have to be ready for their next meeting.
Good parents know that they have to welcome their children home from school with hugs and kisses. Leaders and parents know that they have to be fully present, and at their best for the people they care about.
The bottom line is that successful people do not let Garbage Trucks take over their day.
What about you? What would happen in your life, starting today, if you let more garbage trucks pass you by?
Here's my bet. You'll be happier.
Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so...
Love the people who treat you right.
Forget about the ones who don't.
Believe that everything happens for a reason.
If you get a chance, TAKE IT!
If it changes your life, LET IT!
Nobody said it would be easy...
They just promised it would be worth it!
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Saturday, October 11, 2008
So sit back and enjoy the journey on the positive side!
yours in wellness